There has been a long discussion regarding the institution of the family. As of now, this has been, largely a failure. Why? Because most of the issues that has been discussed are difficult to be in accordance with, because they happen too fast. One thing is to root out corruption, nobody has anything against this, and I suppose everybody knew that is was appropriate and necessary. The more focus on the family is also welcomed, but it has been difficult to weather the pace.

So what do we do? We focus on the positive perspectives of the discussion we have. The family is a very, very beautiful institution, and if the principles on which it is founded on works, it can and will bring joy to many.

So instead of looking at the external rules as who and how to marry, look at the internal things. How to found the family on serious values. Values that will serve all children, father, mother, grandparents, siblings, cousins.

When I was in Bangladesh, where my father comes from, I had an insight into some of the good and bad mechanics of a larger family. There is a lot of control in such a family. Social control, this can be a burden to the more free spirits. So perhaps giving room and accepting each other in a family is important. At the other hand, we really stuck together. One of my uncles had kidney decease, and he could not really function without his kidney. So one of his brothers donated his own kidney to his brother, knowing very well, that he would have trouble without that kidney. A true act of solidarity.

In other words, the values and the way a family works is really the true discussion that would potentially bring the discussion onto a new more constructive and positive track.

Tolstoy said, that all good families are the same, and all bad families are different. Good is order, bad is chaos. Finding those principles that will lead to good order are the principles that may elevate the discussion onto a higher and more working level. If you are a good carpenter, you make good furniture. When you do this, it is because you are working methodically and according to certain principles. It is the same with the family, it requires good principles to follow and hard work to realize.

G-d bless the willingness to comply with the principles that will ultimately lead us to G-d.

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